Guardrails

The pastor of the church I regularly attend recently completed a multi part series on guardrails. Believer or not, we all agree that the purpose of guardrails are to keep you safe from danger. I had planned to save this topic for later, but after reading the responses to my last post, I feel it’s appropriate now.
One part of the guardrails series focused on physical guardrails in intimate relationships. He discussed specific guardrails for single and married individuals. As a single woman with an active dating life, I believe guardrails are essential. Here are just a few I follow:

• Always drive your own car on first dates and meet in a public place
• No sleepovers unless you’re ready for sex (and the consequences of sex)

These guardrails have helped keep me safe from physical and emotional danger while dating. It’s important that we all set boundaries in our relationships. If you’ve been dating for a while and are not getting the results you want, it might not be a bad idea to reflect on your dating practices and decide what guardrails are right for you. When it comes to sex, only you can decide when the time is right. Whatever that time is for you, if you’re seeking a serious relationship it should be after you and your partner have defined the parameters of your relationship and achieved emotional intimacy. Until you’ve reached that point, refrain from allowing yourself to be in situations that you know test your limits and cause you to ignore your guardrails. As a general rule, dating adults usually don’t have sleepovers, tickle fights, or wrestle without sexual consequences.
To address the comments on the prior post, women and men are giving it up too soon. Even if you aren’t looking for marriage, we all want to be respected. It’s hard to respect people, regardless of their sex, when they act impulsively with no boundaries for their lives. Until next time, keep your guardrails up.

I am,
Single in Atl